I was approached by Jane Isay’s publisher to share her latest book Unconditional Love. I was excited, because it introduces a new perspective on my marriage and family blog. I’ve not had a guest share her grandparental insight with us. It’s a treat to learn from our elders as they pass knowledge and experience on to future generations.
Please welcome Jane!
About the Author
Jane Isay is the author of Secrets and Lies, Walking on Eggshells and Mom Still Likes You Best. As a book editor for more than forty years, she discovered Mary Pipher’s Reviving Ophelia, commissioned Patricia T. Connor’s best selling Woe is I and Rachel Simmon’s Odd Girl Out, and edited such nonfiction classics as Praying for Sheetrock and Friday Night Lights. She lives in New York City.
You can reach Jane at:
The 10 Commandments for New Grandparents
1. Praise the new parents. Repeat the praise.
2. Don’t like the name? Never complain.
3. Never criticize your daughter-in-law. Ever.
4. Remember that you are no longer in charge.
5. They aren’t doing it the way you did? Relax. It’s their turn.
6. House a mess? Don’t say a word. Nothing to eat? Pack a snack.
7. In a crisis, stay calm and hold the baby.
8. Sleep-deprived new parents are also fussy babies: give them love and acceptance.
9. When things get tense, get out of the house.
10. Complain to your friends, not your kids.
About the Book
Difficulties rarely appear between grandparents and the grandkids. Suddenly our grown children
have the power to let us be with the grandkids—or not. We may be welcome—or not—on the
basis of what we say, what we do, and how we behave. How can we overcome these conflicts
and accentuate the love that leaps? How can we help the grandchildren blossom in this troubled world? Help is on the way.
I truly enjoyed reading Unconditional Love and the way Jane breaks down grandparenting from receipt of the joyful news through older grandchildren. I highly recommend Unconditional Love for parents and grandparents alike. My aha moment is when Jane reminds us that relationships look a lot different today than a generation ago, and to be accepting of your family member’s partner choice. I imagine this step can reduce unnecessary family strife.
Do you have any granparenting insight you’d like to share with us? Please do!