Bickering – to argue about petty or trivial matters. Have you ever bickered with your spouse or children? I have. In fact, our family pestered once another, sadly, just a few days before Valentine’s Day! And, to be honest, I can’t even remember about what.

Afterwards, I ran errands, and remembered my husband wanted to watch War Room. So, I picked up the DVD at our local Redbox. That night, we watched it together not knowing the content of the movie. The title to me suggested a military movie. However, the content is very different. Without giving away too much, it’s about a family that’s divided. Ouch!


War Room

From my experience the root of arguing is twofold; Either one person wants what the other has such as children fighting over a toy. Or one person believe he/she is right and the other person is wrong such as he says it’s blue and she says it’s pink. The root is self. The Bible puts it this way. “Where there is strife, there is pride, but wisdom is found in those who take advice.” – Provers 13:10 We observe this phenomenon with toddlers when they snatch toys from others saying, “Mine,” and a parent or a teacher gently remind him/her to share their toys.

Here are three tips I’ve learned how to end bickering.

Separate As a Pre-School Teacher, one of the quickest ways to end an arugment is to separate them. This technique allows the boys and girls to cool off, gather themselves and find something or someone else to play with so that both are content. After a few minutes, allow them to come back together to talk about it. I’ve found this to work in my home too with my own son and daughter.

Communication After the cooling period, we regather to clarify and discuss the issue. This ensures we’re on the same page. Sometimes, we come to a simple solution and other times we agree to disagree; respecting each other’s opinions.

Pray We pray to God asking Him to change our hearts so we can end the quarrel. After our recent dispute, all four of us asked God to help us in the area of eliminating strife so that peace is restored. In all honesty, I’ve noticed a reduction in the number of times we get agitated. Thank you Lord!

I believe we will encounter conflict in our lives, because we are all different people with differing backgrounds, beliefs, and needs. However, we can work together to resolve family tension and remain unified.


How does your family resolve differences? I’d love to hear! Please share your comments below.